Sink or Swim

Not going to call these rules, steps or even a policy , because when it comes to women and love, there's varies of feeling we go through. So currently I feel like I'm sinking, letting people all around me pull me from the left to the right, not seeing them selves that I'm drowning inside and no one is saving me from hitting the bottom of the ocean. but I find myself reaching to pull people out of puddles, shallow water where there still are able to walk and get themselves out of it but because I care more than I should I'm still there with my hands extended pulling them out. I need someone to rescue me, rain on my earth , replenish my well,help my grass grow greener on my side, my sun is shining but it's being over shadows by the clouds that hover over my life. I need love something so easy and simple to say, can be so hard for people to give whole heartily. Tired of sinking, coming back up for air, retrieving my breathing pattern, and then here I go, sinking again. How many times can I continue to sink , before I can no not depend on my life jacket and my strength runs out and i can no longer tread the water anymore and I'm down to the bottom of the ocean, no help, no screams from me, pointless I'm emerge for life. I can no longer swim with someone who doesn't have a extra life jacket. I want to swim across the ocean called life, stop to enjoy the waves of the up's and downs that life gives us. I need to be able to swim through rough water, stormy seas and bad weather. Sinking can no longer be an option. Swimming is the only way I can get to that island where all my dreams come true. let me swim.